I think it’s going to be a blogging day. Writing is such a salve. It doesn’t matter if no one even reads them they are there. And I can imagine the moment of clarity they might offer, or intriguing question they may create. So for anyone who follows me turn off email notifications, I think today might a record for blogs.
Blog 1 of the day: Pulling off the plaster off. I am holding my hand over the red button and no idea how long I will resist pushing it…
This blog though is all about authentic self we hear it thrown about so much these days. “Bring your authentic self to work”. “Be the whole you.” I have just realised what a load of utter nonsense this is. Let me illuminate.
I follow this amazing vocal coach on Instagram …
He talks about when he gives people vocal coaching they say things like “but that is not my real voice”. Vin reflects on this discomfort with sounding different, and using our voice differently, but affirms that of course it is your real voice. It is your vocal box and your mouth creating the words you are just using it differently.
It got me thinking about when we choose to hide or hold back on part of ourselves. As an example I never shared for years that I was non-binary. Honestly I was afraid the world couldn’t accept me that way. Does that mean for each of of those I was not the authentic me. No, it means that for those days one part of my authentic self was a little afraid and held back. But in that moment in time, I was still all me. The original, complete me.
Can we please stop using the language of authentic self. We are all authentic every minute or every day. Some of those parts of us may be less obvious or more open than others but they are all us.
It’s totally ok if you feel at certain times you need to hold back, ifs that what your authentic self needs. You shouldn’t feel like you are being deceitful, unless you are intentionally hiding something to the disadvantage of someone else. If you holding back because you feel afraid or you are struggling to accept those part of you yourself, it’s a process, you are still you.